Divorce, Gomez, Health, Life, Proverbs 16:18, Tall & Handsome, WebMD, Women's health

Divorce Has Lasting Toll on Health, by Beverly Hicks Burch

Divorce Has Lasting Toll on Health

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I found the above article this morning on WebMD and feel it applies to my concern for women’s health matters. Please take the time to read it…especially if you are a survivor of divorce or someone in your family is!

This one personally hit home for me because I fit the demographic…plus, I had the ex from hell, with a matching sibling and girlfriend/paramour/new wife…the “other woman” who broke up the marriage. She was Gomez’  co-worker and she and the ex both worked  for the same company where my father had spent a 25+ year distinguished and respected career.

When they pulled their shenanigan phone calls started pouring out of the woodwork to my Dad (and a few to me) about their behavior at work (they thought they had been “sly” and covered their tracks…but, nope they just Punk’d themselves). Daddy and I were also informed about her less than distinguished and respected reputation…

During the divorce I started out with a “handicap”…I was disabled with a laundry list of disabilities and chronic health problems. Gomez was determined to see I was penniless when he emptied out the bank accounts and “supported” me with a grand amount of $250 for almost 18 months for food, medicine, health and dental care, gas, legal fees and any other necessities. Fortunately I managed to get a small pittance from an account he forgot about…but it was waaaay below the national poverty line…he also bought a Ford Explorer he put on a second mortgage on the house (that I ended up having to pay for even though I hadn’t worked outside of the home in over 21 years…I was a disabled, diplaced homemaker…I did manage to stop payment on a check he wrote for a down payment and that added a little to my living money…)

So much for vows like in sickness and in health…for better or worse…unless of course you find a gem like my Tall & Handsome 🙂

Oh…and those legal fees…well, that’s one of the things that enraged him. He wanted to go get a lawyer, but he had the nerve to stand in my living room and tell me he had told his lawyer, “I told him you would be conservative and get legal help off the internet.” When I retained legal representation he saw red and his freckles went 3D…I began to wonder if he was a sociopath…

The stress of the divorce and the battle he waged to put me through…the “lessons” he felt he wanted to teach me (his words) even though he was a low-life, lying, cheating, stealing dog (yep, he stole our son’s income tax refund out of the mailbox, cashed the check, kept the money while our son was at SERE training. It was a whopping $235 and my son found out from the IRS what had happened…his Daddy didn’t have the gonads to tell him what he had done) and the ex’s desire to batter and bruise me casts long shadows…even today. I think he would have killed me if he could have…he bragged to my poor sick Aunt…”She’ll be dead in five years without ME to take care of her!” (Kinda sounds like Lucifer before the fall to me…”Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before stumbling” Proverbs 16:18 NASB)….Hummm…sounds like he was uttering a death wish/hope/threat for me…

So, I can concurr, confirm and say “Amen” WebMD! Is it any wonder divorce can have a lasting toll on your health?!

But guess what? Eight years down the road I’m still kicking…married to Tall & Handsome, who can still make me feel 18 years old sometimes…

No wonder there is a First Wives Club!! Ladies TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES!!!

© 2009 Beverly Hicks Burch All Rights Reserved.

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